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THE GIVING TREE
by Shel Silverstein
There seem to be two broadly accepted (and debated) interpretations of this painful classic:
If you give to others without considering your own needs, you will lose yourself
Giving endlessly, and selflessly is a gift
But IMO this is a story about our relationship with ourselves.
We all have a Tree of Life that provides endlessly no matter how we poison, ignore, or take advantage of it. It never holds a grudge.
Your Tree of Life waits patiently for your love and appreciation, and is happy when you meet yourself in the deep knowing that your existence is a gift.
Enough with the schmaltz.
Read on for this week’s squirrelly adventures in —
MOTHERHOOD
by The Giving Tree
The other day, I was about to grab my third batch of chestnuts from a bin at my favorite produce market when doubt struck. Something was off.
So, I turned to the aisle of shoppers nearby and yelped, “Has anyone successfully roasted chestnuts before?!”
They all shook their heads, “No.”
Damn. I had already roasted two batches that week with two different recipes. They all turned out horrible, like inedible.
What was I doing wrong?
Ugh.
A determined (albeit anxious) squirrel, I gathered another fist full of nuts and scurried home.
A flurry of coffee and feathery sweaters, I twitched at my opponent. Chewed my cuticles raw with anticipation (see thumb image above).
Drumming my nails on the counter, I thought hard.
Okay. So, no one at the market could help me, but this batch would be different.
How?
…
Ah!
Now, I am armed with this serious eats recipe!
Alton Brown and I are serious—about nuts. We can do this!
But I'd need my full capacity to meet the moment.
So later, when my husband ran an errand, my toddler was at school, and my 9-month-old fell asleep, I followed the Serious recipe inch by inch.
And. Voila!
Yes! Third time’s a… UGH
WTF am I doing wrong?!?!
Wait a second…
NOTHING!
I am doing nothing wrong!
It's the nuts, not the lunatic!
…
You see, I've never roasted chestnuts before.
Truthfully, I don't recall ever eating them, so twice that week I figured it was my fault when I roasted them, peeled them, and saw hairy, weird gray filth in them.
Because everything's my fault.
Even when it happened with two different recipes!
Even when I asked for help, and my knowledgeable, chestnut-loving-step-mother suggested the flaw was in fact with the nuts themselves and not me, I couldn't accept it for two reasons:
I have blind faith in my local supermarket — which is widely known for being a top-notch purveyor of produce
and such a lack of trust in myself that even after TWO BATCHES OF GRAY HAIRY NUTS (LOL) I went back to the same g-ddamn bin AGAIN and reached in for more ways to throw money into my oven
Well, I got the last laugh because this third batch had some good nuts!
Yes. Good 'ol nuts that roasted perfectly with Alton Brown's support.
Jokes on you, me.
It's not my fault! Ha!
(???????)
My point?
The lesson here isn't just to trust myself, to slow down, or to research more thoroughly before jumping from branch to branch like an acrobat with no net!
Those things are all true and someday I will look at them but today there is an even more satisfying lesson here:
You see, I failed at roasting chestnuts twice before I turned to that aisle full of people at my local market and cried, "Has anyone successfully roasted chestnuts?!"
To which everyone said, "NOPE!"
Remember?
The problem is, that I had attributed this response to some widely held belief that chestnuts are hard to make.
Did you?
In retrospect, however, we can see that this group of 11 or so folks are maybe just not super into driving themselves crazy, aka...
They have never roasted chestnuts before!
Ah!
Over and over, I revisit this moment and I think: why did I assume they all said no because they had failed? They said no because they never did it!
I needed to ask the right question.
Something like, "Has anyone ever roasted chestnuts before?"
See, I was assuming they had roasted them and failed.
I assumed the rumors were true and that it was hard to roast chestnuts.
If I had a clue and asked the right question to my fellow produce lovers, I would've known when the “doubt” struck that day at the bin of nuts that it was the nuts, not the lunatic, and saved myself like $6 bucks in shitty rotten produce!
So anyway —
It turns out it's super fucking easy to roast chestnuts, and that’s why I am writing to you.
I hope my neurotic journey through this forest of lousy nuts will inspire you to try it yourself!
Plus, you can do hard things.
The Tree of Life inside of you won't hold a grudge for failure to ask the right questions. The Tree of Life will provide endless opportunities to gather and try again.
…Side note: during this nutty bakeoff of 2024, I couldn't stop thinking about this ex of mine who once told me the only reason he ever dated me was because he heard I was nuts, and he thought to himself, "No one is more nuts than me."
Anyway —
C’EST-NUTS
by The Giving Tree
This is adapted from serious eats: Heat your oven to 425 and put your empty cast iron inside to warm. Cut an X into your chestnuts. Drop them in boiling water for 30 seconds. Drain them. Pat them dry. Put them in the cast iron pan inside the hot oven.
Think happy thoughts about trees.
Roast for 25 min.
Take your nuts out and peel them as soon as they are cool enough to handle. Put the warm nuts on your temples and think of me.
Cover the chestnuts in salt and share them with your friends and family and gobble them all like…
A BOY NAMED SUE
by The Giving Tree
SHE’S GIVING GRANNY SMITH
by The Giving Tree
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